An Interview with DuBell “Juice” Jones by Paul Daisy
Paul Daisy
English- 6th
Mrs. Goldwood
8-24-95
Interview
P: Check one, two. Good day, this is Paul Daisy a.k.a. Big Daze interviewing the one and only DuBell “Juice”Jones…
D: What up, what up.
P: Let’s get right to it.
D: Yeah. Round One Fight.
P: Excellent. Now, DuBell, what would you say is the most pressing issue facing youth today?
D: Good question. I think the most pressing issue today is will the new MK3 codes which let you play as Smoke be the ultimate game play mode for Mortal Kombat fans.
P: What is your stance on playing as Smoke?
D: You know I’ve been a loyal Subzero fan since MK1, but this new character is nearly unbeatable if you know what your doing.
P: Don’t you think dropping through the floor is a cheat move?
D: No more than shooting a rope spike into their chest and yanking them across the screen.
P: Fair enough. Next question. What do you think was the most important era in history.
D: Easy. The 1970’s.
P: Why would you say that? Late Civil Rights Era? Watergate?
D: No. The Opryland Amusement park was opened. 1972.
P: Really? How do you know that?
D: I read it on a plaque at Opryland. Right when you walk in the gates.
P: Good to know. I will have to take your word on it until I can look it up in the library. Next question.
D: Why would you have to look it up? I just told you it was 1972.
P: In case Mrs. Goldwood asks. Next question.
D: I just don’t understand why you can’t just take my word for it.
P: DuBell… seriously…can we focus up here? Next question.
D: Fine. Next question.
P: If you could invent anything to help out people our age what would it be and why?
D: I would invent a telephone that allowed me to have conversations with multiple girls at the same time without them being able to hear each other unless, I wanted them to.
P: DuBell if you made that you would be a gazillionaire.
D: I know, right?
P: Alright, last question on Ms. G’s list.
D: Hit me.
P: If you could recommend any one book to someone your age, what would that book be and how did you come by it?
D: Wow. I’m not much of a reader for fun, but I did read this one book, by Virginia Woolf called A Room of One’s Own.
P: OK. So what was it about?
D: I can’t explain it well, but I will try. It was about this white girl from a century ago just talking about her situation…
P: OK? Sounds like an award winner already.
D: Yeah, I know it sounds boring, but I really connected to what she was saying about needing to have a steady flow of money and your own place.
P: Well yeah, I can see why you like that. Wu-Tang style.
D: Exactly C.R.E.A.M.
[Pause for secret handshake]
P: But how did you find the book?
D: I was at my summer camp, and they try to get you to read if you won’t take a nap during rest hour.
P: Quick question… have you ever actually taken a nap?
D: Not that I can recall.
P: I figured. Please continue.
D: Right, so at camp, next to the decrepit piano in the lodge, they had a crusty old bookshelf with ancient poetry books and old Supraman comics that had been chewed on by raccoons. I honestly picked the Virginia Woolf book because the cover was in decent shape, and it didn’t smell too bad.
P: So, you literally judged a book by it’s cover, and it worked out.
D: Yeah, I guess so. I know they say not to do that, but how else are you supposed to judge a book?
P: I don’t know. I never figured that out either. You think this interview is good enough?
D: Yeah, it’s fine. You ready to go play some basketball?
P: Don’t you need to interview me?
D: Nope. I already interviewed Celeste and her little sisters on the way over.
P: How did you have enough time to do that already?
D: I’m just that good. Let’s go play ball while it’s still light out.
P: Okay. This is Paul Daisy…
D: And DuBell Jones!!
P: …signing off.